Jokes
The best one-liners and long jokes — animal, marriage, doctor, school and more.
Mix Santa
Mix Santa - banta jokes Titanic was sinking. An englishman asked Santa, "How far is land"? Santa: 2 KMs. Englishman jumped into sea. Englishman: Now, which direction? Santa: Downwards!
SardarSardar PHD
Interviewar: what s ur qualification? Sardarji : Sir I am Ph.d. Interviewar : what do u mean by Ph.d? Sardarji : (smiling) PASSED HIGHSCHOOL with DIFFICULTY.. ..
SardarSardar Theory
Sardar's theory : Moon is more impt than Sun, coz it gives light at night when light is needed & Sun gives light during the day when light is not needed!!!
SardarSardar In Bar
Sardar at bar in New York . Man on his right says "Johny Walker single" Man on his left says "Peter Scotch single" Sardar says - "Baljith Singh Married"
SardarThere was a Sardarji
Kidnapping by a sardar... TOO GOOD! There was a Sardarji who was down on his luck. In order to raise some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree and told him, "I've kidnapped you." Sardarji then wrote a note saying: "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put Rs.2, 00,000 in a paper bag and put it beneath the mango tree on the north side of the city playground". Signed: "A Sardarji" Sardarji then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the Sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was kept beneath the mango tree. The boy was sitting next to the bag. Sardarji opened up the bag and found the Rs.2, 00,000 in cash with a note saying: "How can a sardarji do this to a fellow Sardarji? Take the money, and please leave my son." Signed: Another Sardarji
SardarSardar writing exam
Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination which consists of Y/N type questions. He takes his seat in the Examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his wallet out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet - Y for Heads and N for Tails. Within half an hour he is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes, he is seen desperatley throwing the coin, swearing and sweating. The invigilator,alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on. "Oye, I finished the exam in half an hour". "But yaar", he says, " I am rechecking my answers."
SardarSardar in Tamilnadu
One sardar came to Madras and wanted to do shopping in burma bazaar. His tamilian friend told the Sardar that the prices will be costly and hence asked him to bargain for half the price. Sardar went and asked the price of stereo for which the vendor told 2000 Rs. Sardar asked for Rs.1000. vendor told he can give for Rs.1800 for which sardar told no,no only Rs.900. Vendor told ok , i will give it for 1500 Rs for which sardar bargained for Rs.750. It was going on like this when finally vendor out of irritation said he will give the Sardar the stereo free of cost. Our sardar asked whether he will give two.
SardarSardarni Painting
A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a Sardarni painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall. She showed him the instructions on the tin, "For Best Results put on Two Coats"
SardarSardarji Birth
Man: Sardarji where were U born? Sardarji: Punjab . Man: Which part? Sardar: Oye What part part, whole body Is born in Punjab Yaar".
SardarSardar In China
Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital. The Chinese friend just says "CHIN YU YAN" and dies. Sardarji goes to China to find the meaning of his friend's last Words. And finds It means "U R STANDNG ON the OXYGEN TUBE!"
SardarSardarjis wedding
Sardar: Will u marry after I die Wife : No I wiil live with my sister. Wife : Will u marry , after I die . Sardar: No I will also live with ur sister.
SardarIndia and Australia Test
n a Test between India and Australia, a fiery Lee was sending quivers down the Indian spine. The new batsman, our sardar, walked slowly to the crease, not feeling unlike a lamb at the slaughter house. As Lee thundered in, suddenly sardar stood up in the crease, and signalled that he wanted the sight screen adjusted. Adjustments were made and Lee was ready to come in again. Once again, in the middle of his run-up, sardar found something disturbing in the sight screen. Indeed, this went on a few times before the irritated umpire, Steve Bucknor walked up to the batsman and enquired, "Where do you want the sight screen, for God`s sake?" Santa asked, with an ounce of fear, "Could I have it between Lee and me?"!!!
SardarSardar Complained To His Friend
Sardar's wish: when i die, i wana die like my grandpa who died > peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all d passengers in d > bus he was driving..
SardarSardarji And His New Car
One day Sardarji was driving his new car. Suddenly, he collided with a bicycle. The accident caused much damage to the bicycle and the guy was furious. Sardarji ran towards him mumbling apologies, but the man was not pacified. He shouted at sardar got a stout stick and starting hammering it on the windshield. Sardarji was shocked and tried to take the stick from him, requesting him to stop. But the bicycle man (who was incidently very stout) got hold of the Sardarji and carried him ten meters away from his car. He drew a small circle near the road with the stick and asked Sardarji to stay inside and not move outside the circle, threatening him with his stout stick for better measure. Now our Sardarji was not very brave at heart and coolly went to stand in the circle. The man goes back to what he had left in the middle and starts on the headlights. After this, he starts on the rearlights. As soon as he breaks the first one, he hears a faint chuckle from the Sardarji. He breaks the other one, now he could distinctly hear the Sardarji laugh slightly. Enraged, he goes to the Sardarji and asks him why he was laughing. Sardarji says that it was nothing. He comes backs and resumes his assault on the poor car and as he goes on in this act, Sardarji's laughs become louder and louder. Enraged, the bicycle man increases his assault , but the laughs keep on increasing rather than decreasing. At last, the bicycle man can't stop himself. He goes to the Sardar and taking him by the collar, asks him the reason for laughing. Our Sardar at first says it was nothing, but when the man starts getting really rough, he breaks down. He says "If I tell you, you will beat me". The bicycle man, now very curious, promises not to do anything if the Sardar tells him. Satisfied about his safety, our Sardarji says "You know, while u were engaged there, I came out of the circle seventeen times.
SardarA Train Suddenly Deviated
A train suddenly deviated from the tracks and ran onto the nearby fields before returning on the tracks again. The passengers were horrified at this. At the next railway station, the driver was caught and questioned. He was a sardar and explained that a man was standing on the tracks and he refused to budge. The authorities asked him, "Sardarji, are you mad? Just to save one person, you put so many lives in danger. You should have overrun that person." The sardar replied: "Exactly, that is what I was doing, but this idiot started running towards the field when the train came very close."
SardarSardarji And His Lunch
Three Construction workers are working on the 20th floor of a tall building in Bombay. One is a Mallu, the secon! d is a Bengali and the third is a Sardarji. Every day all the three meet in the lunch hall and have their lunch together. One fine day-the Mallu opened his lunch box and finds idlis in the box. He says " I am fed up of eating these idlis daily. If I find idlis in the box tomorrow, i will jump from the 20th floor and die". Next the Bengali opens his lunch box and finds Fish in it and says, If I find fish in my lunch box tomorrow, I am going to jump from the 20th floor of this building and die". Next the Sardarji opens his lunch box and finds Parathas in it and says "Mother promise, if I find parathas in my box tomorrow I am also going to jump from the 20th floor" Next day the three friends meet in the lunch room for lunch. Mallu opens his lunch box and finds Idlis and promptly jumps from the 20th floor and dies. The Bengali opens his lunch box and finds fish in it and jumps from the 20th floor and dies. Sardarji opens his box and finds parathas and he also jumps from the 20th floor and dies. In the combined funeral held for all the three friends by their colleagues, the Mallu's widow says "I did not know he hated idlis so much. If not I would have packed something else for his lunch". The Bengali's widow says "I did not know he hated fish so much. If not I would have packed something else for his lunch" The sardarji's widow says "I do not understand what went wrong. My husband always prepared his own lunch!"
SardarFlash News
Flash news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab . Local sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..
SardarSardar Divorce
A Sardar and his wife filed an application 4 Divorce. Judge asked: How will you divide, you have 3 children? Sardar replied: Ok! We"ll apply NEXT YEAR.
SardarA Romantic Date
ON A ROMANTIC DATE SARDAR'S GIRL FRIEND ASKS HIM, DARLING ON OUR ENGAGEMENT WILL U GIVE ME A RING? HE SAID: YA SURE WHATS YOUR PHONE NUMBER
SardarSanta Banta
Santa: I have swallowed a kay. Doctor: When? Santa: 3 months back! Doctor: What were you doing till now? Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.