Jokes

AT THE DOOR

Q: If your wife is shouting at the front door and your dog is barking at the back door, who do you let in first?A:…

ADAM FERRARA: 35 YEARS OF MARRIAGE

The only marriage I've observed for any length of time is my parents -- 35 years. I asked my pop, I go, 'Pop, 35 years --…

A MATH PROFESSOR'S MISTAKE

A college math professor and his wife are both 60 years old. One evening the wife comes home and finds a note from her husband that…

$100 BILL TATTOO

A guy asks for a tattoo of a $100 bill on his penis. Curious, the tattoo artist asks him why he would possibly want that.He…

Yo' Mama Is So Poor Marriage

Yo' Mama is so poor, she got married for the rice.

You Bet Your Wife

An old couple celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary in a honeymoon suite. All night long, the bellboy hears laughing and clapping sounds from their room.The…

Get Your Wife To Scream And Groan

Q: How do you get your wife to scream and groan when you're having sex?A: Let her catch you doing it.

How have times changed?

In olden times, it is reported that sacrifices were made at the altar.Since then, weddings have been held there, and times haven't changed at all!

Going crazy with confusion

A psychiatrist visited a California mental institution and asked a patient, "How did you get here? What was the nature of your illness?" He got the…

What is the most damaging food?

A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting…

The government cuts costs

The following conversation took place one morning between a wife and her husband. They were discussing government cost cuts that they recently heard about in the…

What a large crowd

A man was traveling down a country road when he saw a large group of people outside a house. He stopped and asked a person why…

The way you say it

It's not what you say, but the way you say it.On a blind date, the boy said to the girl: "Time stands still when I…

Finding perfect men

At a local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends."The man I marry…

Going to the office

Hubby - You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?Wife - When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I…