Jokes
Mice In The Church
Three Pastors were having lunch together at a diner.The first Pastor said, "Ya know, since summer started I've been having trouble with mice in my…
Talking Dog for Sale
Talking Dog for SaleThis guy sees a sign in front of a house "Talking Dog for Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells…
An amazing talking dog
A man and his dog walk into a bar. The man proclaims, "I'll bet you a round of drinks that my dog can talk."Bartender: "Yeah!…
Animal Crackers
When the mother returned from the grocery store, her small son pulled out the box of animal crackers he had begged for. Then, he spread the…
Three rats are sitting at the bar bragging
Three rats are sitting at the bar talking and bragging about their bravery and toughness.The first says, "I'm so tough, once I ate a whole…
Nine things dogs don't understand
1. It's not a laugh to practice barking at 3a.m.2. It's wrong to back Grandma into a corner and guard her.3. He shouldn't jump…
Barking Dog
Bernard, who is noted for his gracious manners, was awakened one morning at 4:44 A.M. by his ringing telephone."Your dog's barking, and it's keeping me…
A circus owner walked into a bar
A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show. On the table was an upside down pot…
Pet Shop Monkeys
A tourist walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, another customer walked in and went over…
Looking to buy a frog
A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?" The…
A Dog's Job
A salesman dropped in to see a business customer. Not a soul was in the office except a big dog emptying wastebaskets. The salesman stared at…
A seal walks into a bar
A seal walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink.The bartender asks the seal, "What's your pleasure?"The seal replies, "Anything but…
Dog Rules, Simplified For Humans
Visitors:Quickly determine which guest is afraid of dogs. Charge across the room, barking loudly and leap playfully on this person. If the human falls down…
Flying Dog
A woman is out looking for a pet, and so she's trying the local pet shops. She walks into a small pet shop and explains her…
A snail buys a fast new car
There was once a snail who was sick and tired of his reputation for being so slow. He decided to get some fast wheels to make…