Jokes
Going crazy with confusion
A psychiatrist visited a California mental institution and asked a patient, "How did you get here? What was the nature of your illness?" He got the…
What is the most damaging food?
A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting…
The government cuts costs
The following conversation took place one morning between a wife and her husband. They were discussing government cost cuts that they recently heard about in the…
What a large crowd
A man was traveling down a country road when he saw a large group of people outside a house. He stopped and asked a person why…
The way you say it
It's not what you say, but the way you say it.On a blind date, the boy said to the girl: "Time stands still when I…
Finding perfect men
At a local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends."The man I marry…
Going to the office
Hubby - You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?Wife - When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I…
Flying in the plane
Sue and Bob, a pair of tight wads, lived in the mid west, and had been married years. Bob had always want to go flying. The…
Wife was mad at me
Two deaf men were in a coffee shop discussing their wives.One signs to the other, boy was my wife mad at me last night!She…
Someone died playing golf
Fred got home from his Sunday round of golf later than normal and very tired. "Bad day at the course?" his wife asked."Everything was going…
Religious battle golf
The Pope met with the College of Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Shimon Peres, the former leader of Israel. "Your holiness," said one of the…
Daughter in college
Did you hear about the banker who was recently arrested for embezzling $100,000 to pay for his daughter's college education?As the policeman, who also had…
Newest ATM machines
"The fees for withdrawing money from your ATM machines are expected to double, even triple. You're gonna pay two to three as much to withdraw your…
Bank customer service
"I'm not saying that the customer service in my bank is bad, but when I went in the other day and asked the clerk to check…
Wealthy investors
A wealthy investor walked into a bank and said to the bank manager, "I would like to speak with Mr. Reginald Jones, who I understand is…